Choices - Rated R Movie

My parents taught me by their words and by their examples that watching Rated R movies was not something Heavenly Father wanted me to do.  Because I spent most of my time with my family, this was an easy value to live up to.  Once I became a teenager, though, I had an opportunity to prove this was something I believed for myself, not just something my parents had chosen for me.

After a hard seventh grade year at Midvale Middle school, I decided to go back to Challenger School for eighth grade.  Since there wasn't actually an eighth grade, I was in a class of seventh grade students.  These were not the kids I had gone through elementary with, and I always struggling to feel like I fit in.

At the end of the school year, I was invited to a party with the whole class.  We went swimming at the birthday boy's house, then we were invited inside to watch a movie.

I hadn't heard of the movie, so I asked what it was rated.  When I found out it was Rated R, there was no hesitation or question of what I would do.  I waited outside by the pool for the duration of the movie.  The only other person outside was the boy's dad.

I did not gain respect or admiration for my choice, but I wasn't made fun of either.  What I did gain was a stronger conviction of my own values and the knowledge that when faced with a difficult decision, I did know how to choose the right.

Family Activities - ABC Game

Until we moved to Draper during the summer before I was in sixth grade, we lived in Kearns, Utah and attended school in Sandy, Utah.  This meant we had a thirty minute drive to and from school each day.  My mom made sure we used this time to the fullest, practicing our spelling words, reading aloud, and sometimes car time even doubled as scripture study time.  But on days when there wasn't something pressing to study, we would play the ABC Game.

I remember playing both cooperatively and competitively.  Sometimes the goal was to find all the letters of the alphabet without using the same billboards we'd used previously.  Other times the goal was to be the first to find all the letters without duplicating each other's finds.

Now that I'm raising my own children, I can see why my mom suggested the game.  It's a great way for the little ones to review their letters (and later words, as we were required to state both the letter and the word we found it in, "S - Store 'n' Save!"), and it's a great way to keep the kids focused on something other than bothering each other. 

And as my personal trek from my home in West Valley City, Utah to my parents home in Draper, Utah so closely resembles our daily drive to school, I find myself looking for letters in the old familiar places.  Even after twenty years, I remember clearly how important it was to be to "J" before we reached the junction from I-215 to I-15, then the mad dash from "J" to "Q" to be the first to spot La Quinta, just to the east of the freeway.  Finally, the first person to "Z" would certainly spot ZCMI off the 10600 South exit, and the next in line would nab Zion's Bank.  With three girls in the game, that would pretty much determine the loser, since there were no more chances to spot a "Z" between the bank and the school.

Sadly, ZCMI is gone, and we don't take the 10600 South exit to get to Grandma and Grandpa's house.  I guess my kids will have to find their own "Z."

Grandparents - Gpa C's Antics

Grandpa Casdorph was always a bit of a tease.  We'd often make a yearly pilgrimage to Arizona to visit Grandma and Grandpa Casdorph for Christmas.  I had long hair, and my mom would often put it in two braids, then loop each braid back up to its start.  We called this "doggie ears."  Whenever Grandpa would see my hair like that, he'd say he was going to put to nails in the closet and hang me up by my pigtails.  I would just laugh.

He also played this game with all the grandkids where he'd put his hands on your waist, count to three, and on three, help you jump up really high.  At least that's the version he'd play with all the other grandkids.  On my turn, he'd count, "one... two..." and then on "three..." he'd prevent me from jumping at all.

One summer while my sisters and I were at their house for a week, Grandpa took to calling the whole milk "gorilla milk."  He liked to tease us all, and asked Lisa where gorilla milk came from.  Well, from gorillas of course.

I'm not even sure I remember the origins of the phrase "too much butter" but I know that I try at all costs to avoid having baked potatoes with Grandpa, because he's always certain to direct that comment, in full West-Virginia-accented glory, straight at me.  I think maybe it was a comment I made as a child.

Grandpa keeps a jar of pickled pigs feet in his fridge, and he actually eats them.  One of his favorite new antics is to insist that I used to eat those when I was a kid.  My mom swears I never did.

I also used to think Grandpa wasn't very good at checkers, because somehow I always managed to beat him.  Having recently taught my own 5 year old the basics of this game, I now realize Grandpa always let me win but did so without me realizing it.

First Date - Halloween Dance

In my family, the rule (based on the counsel from the LDS prophets) was that I couldn't date until I was 16.  Having skipped first grade, I was young for my grade and consequently the last of my friends allowed to date.  I wasn't even old enough to attend Homecoming of my Junior Year.  The first dance I could go to was the Halloween Dance, a girl's choice dance.  I asked my friend (and current crush) Dave Dunn to go with me.  I know it was a really huge deal to me at the time, but I can't remember a thing about how I asked him or how he answered me.  In fact, I remember little about the whole experience!

My group decided to go with a 50's theme: poodle skirts for the girls, and jeans with white t-shirts for the guys.  We ate a 50's themed dinner at a friend's house, then headed off to the dance.

Far more memorable for me was when Dave returned the favor and asked me on a date.  As a personal rule of his, any girl that treated him to a date got treated in return.  (This is a principle I'd like to teach to my boys.)  Dave's dad's company had a Christmas party, and Dave needed a date.  I got to go see A Christmas Carol at Hale Theater and then hang out with Dave's family.  At some point, we also stopped by Dave's dad's engineering office, which I thought was pretty cool.

I was fortunate to get to go on both of these early dates with one of my best friends and with such a gentleman.  He set the bar high for all my future dates.

Houses - Blue and White House

The first home my parents owned in Utah was a small three bedroom, one bathroom home in Kearns.  We lived there when Lisa was born but had moved before Michelle was born.  Rather than sell this home, my parents kept it as a rental property when we moved into a bigger home.

My memories of this home are not from this early timeperiod.  We actually lived there again when I was 11.  Since my parents had kept this home as a rental, we were able to move back into it while our home in Draper was being built.  At this point, there were 5 of us living in very close quarters.  We used one of the bedrooms as an office and storage area, so there were only 2 bedrooms left.  Of course Mom and Dad used one, and we three girls shared the other.

I was the proud owner of a daybed, but as a punishment for some offense, I had lost the right to sleep in it.  This meant I got the top bunk, Michelle got the bottom bunk, and Lisa slept in my daybed.  Our tiny bedroom also housed all our dressers, leaving almost no visible wall space.

We only spent a year in this home, but I have many vivid memories from this time period.  They include:

• Meeting Kristin Cook, who lived across the street, and was the only girl in our primary class whose name did not start with "A."  Until I moved in, she was also the only brunette.
• Our dog, Angie, biting the beak of the goose who lived on the other side of the fence.  My dad had to literally beat her to get her to let go, and the dog teeth shaped grooves in the goose's bill never went away.
• Being the pianist of a group for the first time.  I accompanied the primary on He Sent His Son for the primary program.  Kristin and I also alternated playing for opening exercises.
• Mom's black eye.  My mom tripped over a laundry basket we'd left lying out.  She hit her face on the arm of a large rocking chair and got two horrible black eyes.  I remember her saying she didn't want to pick me up from dance because she looked like she'd been abused.
• Picking the "grapes" from the vine on the fence and making grapejuice.
• Fainting for the first time.  I was sick with the stomach flu and had to make a quick run down the hall to the bathroom.  I turned the corner and ran into an open cupboard.  I passed out, and woke up throwing up all over myself.  Good times.
• Telling Lisa there was no Santa Claus.  Not a fond memory.
• Convincing Lisa and Michelle to carefully unwrap corners of their Christmas gifts to see what they got.  Also not a fond memory.
• My favorite Christmas ever (despite the shenanigans).  All our Christmas stuff was in storage.  Dad bought a small Christmas tree, and lacking a tree stand, drilled three screws up through an end table straight into the trunk of the tree to keep it upright.  We used dad's socks (nailed to the ceiling) as stockings, and decorated the tree with paper snowflakes and popcorn strands.

The time we spent in this home was a transitional period for my family, and it happened to hit during one of the most difficult times in my life as I was trying to figure out where I fit in.  I think having my family so close was definately a benefit, and I will always fondly remember this home.

Birthdays - Traditions

Birthdays were never a huge deal at our house, and we rarely had an actual birthday party.  Instead, we celebrated with a family outing to our favorite restaurant and a birthday cake. 

Until it closed, I would always pick "Ponderosa" for my birthday dinners, because they had all-you-can-eat cocktail shrimp, and I think they even had a birthday special.  I was very sad when they closed this restaurant, and I've honestly never found anywhere else as a good replacement.

I generally got school clothes for my birthday, because my birthday is on September 28th.  My mom would take me shopping at ShopKo during the back-to-school sales and put the items I liked on layaway.  We'd take home a few for the start of school, but I'd get most of them a few weeks later for my birthday.

Elementary School - To the Office

My mom taught at a private school, so I had the opportunity to get an education we could not have otherwise afforded.  We lived in Kearns, but we drove nearly 30 minutes each way to get to school at Challenger Elementary in Sandy, Utah.  We would play the alphabet game, practice our spelling words, or read out loud to mom during our drive.

My aunt, Enid Lewis, was the principal at the school, and with my mom teaching there, I didn't have too many opportunities to get into trouble.  On occassion, however, I still found a way.

One day in third grade, we had a substitute teacher.  During a literature lesson, I noticed there was a pencil-sized hole in my desk.  Naturally, I stuck my pencil in it.  The substitute thought I was defacing school property, and sent me to the office.  I knew if I went to Aunt Enid's office, my mom was sure to find out.  So I went to the bathroom instead.  After a few minutes in the bathroom, I returned to class and told the teacher I'd been to see Mrs. Lewis.

Bad plan.

The substitute teacher talked to Mrs. Lewis.  Who talked to my mom.  Who talked to me.  Who had to admit to lying and got in way more trouble than I would have for innocently sticking my pencil into an already formed hole.

Oh how I wish I could say I learned my lesson and never told a lie again.